semi-annual open letter to my students

A few things for you to keep in mind, my lovely students:

1) If you have to miss class because of an urgent family get-together, it is not an excused absence. And if you were sick earlier in the semester, which can be an excused absence, but you never contacted me, provided documentation, nor made up your work, that is also not an excused absence. It is also, if I may use a technical term, not my freaking problem.

2) If your paper is due on, say, Friday, and I receive it on, say, the following Wednesday–yes, I noticed it was late.

3) If your audience–which you must describe, as part of the paper grade–is “pretty much everybody,” you’re doing it wrong.

4) Yes, spelling counts.

5) Yes, grammar counts.

6) No, printing your essay on fancy-schmancy resume-style bond paper is not going to help.

7) No, illustrations, clip art, and colored ink won’t help, either.

8) No, 8-10 pages does not mean 7 pages. It also does not mean 17 pages. It means–shocking, I know–8-10 pages.

9) The fact that you’re this panicky about the final essay means that at least you care how you do in this course….and while, for some of you, it’s a tad late to be worrying about this, I am glad you are concerned about it a little bit. My advice? Come to class for the last two weeks, do the work, and write the best essay you can. My other advice: do not spend your precious last-minute time trying to get notes from your friend via Facebook because you are too busy sunning yourself like a lizard on the quad. Or because you are hung over or too tired or busy with an anthropology exam.

10) I love teaching this class. And you know what? I actually do NOT want you to get an F. So stop looking at me like that.

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One response to this post.

  1. Posted by academama on April 26, 2010 at 9:15 pm

    WHAT!

    Why is my #8 an emoticon? I am filled with rage.

    Reply

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